Today I tried to read the news happening back home. I like to keep current with affairs, so I know whats going on in the world – this is prove I am not weird. While reading through the dribble, and noticing it has not changed in two years, I came across an odd feeling – I simply no longer care.
Now thats odd, some might think. Thats nasty, others might say, but hear me out on this. South Africa, in my mind, was always home. And now, it is no longer my home. I was born in South Africa. I am 100% South African male, but South Africa is no longer my home. My home is were I am now. Its a scary thought for an expat, as you find yourself needing to have a base or roots.
All this time, my mind has been dwelling on the idea of going home for a visit. Today that changed. I will not be going home. Instead, I will be leaving my visit to return home, to return to New Zealand. There is a saying amongst computer geeks – Home is where your computer is. And my computer is 10 feet away from me. Yes, I miss my family and friends. Yes, I miss some of the weather and the food. But there will be stuff in New Zealand I will miss while I am “home”. This alone brings about the change in thought. Another thing that struck me recently is the fact that I can no longer hear the Kiwi accent. It sounds the same to me. Sure, when compared I can hear the difference in the accents when I speak, but I can not hear the twang it used to have.
What does this all mean? I dont really know. I know I will go back and visit my family, my mom and friends and I’ll miss them terribly when I have to return, but I’ll be coming home. And that makes all the difference.
So New Zealand, it took you a while, but you have managed to warm up to me very nicely.
PS: Before you lynch me, part of the reason I am not really home sick is thanks to my girlfriend’s family. They are South African and have managed to hold onto the good ole SaFa accent really well. Being around them has felt like I have just moved to a stranger part of South Africa – one where you never need to lock your car.